A man had a dog who was a bad dog.

The dog ate the homework,
the cat, and software.

Bad dog.

So the man got his 38 Police
Special, grabbed the bad dog by the ears, and took him out to the
front lawn to blow him away.

His neighbor sees the Cruel Act about to be done and says, "No!
Don't shoot the dog!"

"Why not," says the man. "He's a bad dog. Can't do anything
with him."

The neighbor replies, "Haven't you ever heard of the Oral
Roberts Dog Training School? Results guaranteed."

Well, the man had some mercy in him.

He got a box and punched
some air holes in it, put the dog in it, and shipped him off to
Tulsa.

Time passed.

Then one day the UPS driver said "Sign here" and gave him a
box.

He opened the box.

Therein, well washed and looking
righteous, was his dog.

"Come on out," said the man.

The dog came.

"Sit," said the
man, and the dog sat.

"Down!"

The dog lay down so fast the grass
shook.

"Wow," said the man. "We have to show this to the guy next
door. Heel!"

And the dog put his paw on the man's head and
commenced to pray...