A drunk man is stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter.

A cop pulls up and says, “I’ve got to take you in, pal. You’re obviously drunk.”

The wasted man asks, “Are you absolutely sure I’m drunk?”

“Yeah, buddy, I’m sure,” says the cop. “Let’s go.”

“Thank goodness,” the wino blurts. “I thought I was crippled.”