The title of the article was "Best
Comeback Line Ever".

Police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22 year old
white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38pm
Friday.
Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public
indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse
on Monday.
The suspect allegedly stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch,
he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and
there was no one around here for miles. At least
I thought there wasn't." he stated in a phone interview from the
Lawrenceville jail. Lawrence went on to state that he pulled over to
the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate
this purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged
"need".
"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with
evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to
notice
the Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his
audience
until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."
Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.
"I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you
are screwing a pumpkin?"
He got real surprised, as you'd expect, and then looked me straight in
the face and said, "A pumpkin!? Damn... is it midnight already?"