There's a hooker in my cooker,

and boy, she is a quite a looker!

It started out, all last night,

when there was a great fight.

 

A guy was sporting a leopard-skin coat,

the girl was screaming like a goat.

The guy asked if I wanted a piece,

I said, "Good Lord, that cooch smells like cheese!"

 

The pimp swore that she was clean,

he also stated that she was mean.

So I took him up on that,

$45.00? For a bitch that fat?

 

We strolled up on up to my room

When then the neighbors heard a SONIC BOOM!

The bed we were on, seemed to have broke,

God-Almighty, I popped that girl's yolk!

 

Then all of a sudden she started to scream,

I yelled, "OMIGOD, I'm gonna cream!"

My sheets were drenched in semen and sweat,

I said, "Damn, bitch, yer pussie's wet!"

 

She got on all fours, and begged for more

I thought to myself, "God-damn, what a whore!?"

So I got behind her, and gave her my stuff,

She began to huff and puff, then later she got rough

 

She turned herself around, and showed me her tit

I said, "C'mon, baby, lemme get a little bit!"

She said, "Damn, baby, NOT SO HARD!"

So we started again, her tits shook like a tub-a-lard

 

When we were done, we decided to lay down

All was quiet, there wasn't any sound...

Then all of a sudden, we heard a knock at the door,

The people outside screamed, "Where is that whore?!"

 

I said, "Hurry up, bitch, get in the oven!"

She said, "C'mon, honey, quit wit' da shovin!"

I let the people in, and they snooped around

They ask the question, "And who owns this gown?"

 

They said it must be hers, it smells like cheese!

I said, "C'mon guys, get out please."

They asked what was the scent coming from the cooker,

I said to myself, "They're gonna find that hooker!"

 

I said, "Its nothing, just my extra cheesy pizza."

Someone yelled, "I betcha its that bitch Mitsa!"

They said, "Open the oven, we gotta take a look,"

I said, "C'mon guys, I gotta let my pizza cook!"

 

All of a sudden, I had a gun in my face,

"If you don't open that oven, you're brains will be all over the place"

I became scared, so I reached for a pot,

The last thing I heard was that gun shot.

 

When I woke up, I was laying in cream

And to my astonishment, it was a wet dream

I went to the kitchen to get a coffee-cup,

I heard a sound in the oven, I wonder whats up...

 

I grab myself a knife, and slowly walk over

I think to myself, "God-damn whats that odor?"

I open the door, and to my dismay,

There was that bitch, saying, "I WANT MY PAY!"

 

 

Making People Piss Their Pants Since 1999!