Once upon a time Nasa decided to send 3 astronauts to space
for 2 years.

NASA allowed each of them to take 200 pounds of baggage each.

The first astronaut decided to take along his wife, the
second decided to take along books to learn how to speak
German, while the third astronaut decided to take along
cigarettes.

Two years later, when the space shuttle landed, there was a
big crowd waiting to welcome them home.

First came the first astronaut and his wife and each of them
had a baby in their arms.

Next, out came the second astronaut speaking fluent German.

They both gave their speeches and got a rousing applause.

Suddenly out came the third astronaut with a cigarette in his
mouth.

He walked up to the podium and snarled to the crowd and asked,
'Has anyone got a friggin' match?'

Making People Piss Their Pants Since 1999!