YOU MIGHT BE IN A "REDNECK" VOLUNTEER FIRE DEPARTMENT IF..

• Your department has ever had two emergency vehicles pulled over for drag racing ... on the way to a fire.
• Your firehouse has wheels.
• Fire training consists of everyone standing around a bonfire, swapping fish stories and drinking.
• You've ever let someone's house burn down because they wouldn't let you hunt on their property.
• You don't own a Dalmatian, but you do have a coon dog named Sparky.
• You've walked through a Christmas display and came up with at least three new ideas for the lighting scheme on your fire truck.
• Your engine had to be towed in the last parade through town.
• Dispatch can't mention your name without laughing.
• Your defibrillator is a pair of jumper cables and a marine battery.
• Your pumper truck has been on fire more times than it's been to a fire.