Let's take a look at what you are asking for.

There are 365 days per year available for work. There
are 52 weeks per year in which you already have two day
off per week.

Since you spend 16 hours each day away from work, you
used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available.

You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee breaks that
accounts for 23 day each year, leaving only 68 days
available, with one hour lunch period each day, you
have used up another 46 days, leaving only 22 days
available for work.

You normally spend two days per year on sick leave,
this leaves you only 20 days available for work.

We are off for 5 day's holidays per year, so your
available working time is down to 15 days.

We generously give you 14 days vacation per year, which
leaves only one day available for work and I'll be
damned if you're going to take that day off !!