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Don't you have some laundry to do or something?
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Ohh, you are so cute when you get all pissed off.
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You're just upset because your ass is beginning to spread.
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Wait a minute - I get it. What time of the month is it?
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You sure you don't want to consult the great Oprah on this one?
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Sorry. I was just picturing you naked.
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Whoa, time out. Football is on.
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Looks like someone had an extra bowl of bitch flakes this morning!
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Is there any way we can do this via e-mail?
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Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain't loaded.