A Canadian, a Russian and an American all wanted to show off to each other
so they each bought a toilet.

The Russian bought a wooden toilet, the Canadian bought a marble toilet,
and the American bought a musical toilet.

The next day the Canadian came back to complain and said, "I want a
refund. Every time I use the toilet, I slip off it"

The day after that the Russian came to complain and said, "I want a
refund. Every time I sit on the toilet I get splinters in my bottom"

The next day, the American came and said, "I want a refund. Every time I
sit down, I hear my national anthem and I have to stand up"