-
The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.
-
You let your 12-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
-
You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
-
You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
-
Jack Daniel's makes your list of "Most Admired People"
-
Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey,watch this"
-
Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.
-
You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines,"
-
You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.
-
The bluebook value of your truck changes depending on how much gas is in it.
-
You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.
-
One of your kids was born on a pool table.
-
You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.
-
You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.
-
You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high school.
-
You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk
